April 16th, 2007

Stairway To Heaven

I wish the title was related to the song itself,nothing else,but alas,it wasn't.

At around 14th,Saturday morning,6am or so,my grandpa,he went on. He was at the hospital,suffering from Tuberculosis,the doctor diagnosed it and was shocked to see TB developed on for years or maybe decades and no treatment was sought during those periods. He was a smoker,quite a heavy one.

Funny thing,the last time I spoke to him was on the phone,I feel quite unpleasant trying to call him cause I don't feel like I got anything to say other than saying thank you to him for the money he sent me as well as the wishes for my birthday.

The conversation however,didn't last more than 23 seconds. He wished me a good happy birthday and said to behave and study hard. -I can't hold back now,I'm weeping as I write this down- Study hard? I've been thinking alot and it's really disturbing,in all my life,I'm the "Last Minuter",I never manage to control my laziness. I've never find a way to study what's on my book and make an effort to memorize it. I seriously need help,advice needed here.

It's not about that,it's about grandpa. The thing that scares me alot is,the doctor claim he was fine when he was at the hospital. My uncle was beside him all the time I think. The thing is that,he came over from Sarawak (Borneo) to have a vacation with us, he never show any signs of TB whatsoever, no heavy coughing,night sweats or skin discoloredment. He was having a blast here,he played guitar and harmonica,we went shopping for his music,he gave my bro his guitar too and he tells me about the family tree and history,I even followed him to get his haircut and his photos developed. We even celebrated his birthday together,had a wonderful dinner,we were all dressed up sharply and invited my dad's brother and his wife together too. I never understand how could he had gone,how could he be a victim of TB all of a sudden.

I'm not really religious or whatnot but,the freaky thing is that,during that day,on the 14th,a huge thunderstorm appeared around my area,the thunder strike two times in a same period. I never had that in my life,it's really scary. Winds were blowing madly too. Other than that,it lasted for a couple of hours.

The current situation is,he was buried this morning,Sunday. My mom and bro bought air tickets and go back to Borneo. They'll be back on Tuesday,that leaves me and dad behind,problem is,I doubt dad can fetch me to school back and fro,I wonder if I should skip school? I'm really worried about dad's workload though. Still,it's only two days...

I wonder one thing,a song,what song? I don't think he'll like "Always Look On The Bright side of Life." Or "Stairway to Heaven" or even "Angel".I wish to learn a song he love so I can play it,to remember him by...

God Bless Edward Sio. Do remember that we all deeply love you and cherish every moment with you.

I don't want to experience another loss.Never.
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